Kelley Irwin

One day last week (Dec 2023), Dad said he was on Cloud 9 ☁️. This was a perfect moment to end a tough year for all of us. 🥳

It has been one year since we received a formal medical diagnosis of dementia. Our family and friends have learned along the way to appreciate the happy exchanges and deflect the others. It’s not easy and there’s no playbook.

This day was a busy one. I was listening to a personalized playlist with Dad and could tell he was distracted.

Me: Dad, can you hear this music?
Dad: Yes. (Making a face)
Me: Do you like it?
Dad: No. (5 minutes ago, he did like it)
Me: Do you want me to change the song?
Dad: No, we need to get organized for the event. We won’t have enough food and drinks if we don’t have a list. Nobody is worrying except me. (There is no event to plan.)
Me: Okay. What do we need on the list?
Dad: Ketchup, mustard, hamburgers and soft drinks. Your mother already made the side dishes. You know if there is a question about whether we have enough drinks, buy one more case.
Me: Okay Dad. That’s what you’ve always taught me. Make sure we have enough food and drinks for the guests.

We created our lists and he smiled. Next, we were off to church for a lovely New Year’s Eve service and a dinner celebration. Many of Dad’s friends haven’t seen him for a while and he received hugs and smiles and pats on the back. He was very happy. There were moments of recognition by Dad and other times he asked me to remind him where we were. He asked Mom to whisper names to him as each person approached and it worked well.

As we sat at the dinner, he leaned over to me…
Dad: We had our event planned with the buffet dinner. I don’t think we need it tonight.
Me: I agree. I think we’ve all had enough to eat.
Dad: What will we do with all the plans?
me: I can call and cancel the reservation.
Dad: Yes, that’s a good idea.

I walked out of the room and waited a minute. I returned and told Dad I called.

Dad: What did they say?
Me: They said it’s all taken care of. We can call and reschedule when we are ready. No issue because you are a good customer.
Dad: So it all worked out. That’s good.

Driving home afterwards…
Me: We had a pretty good day, didn’t we Dad?
Dad: We sure did. I’m on cloud nine.
Me: I think we’re going to sleep well tonight heading into the new year.
Dad: Yes, I’m going to sleep without a worry on my mind.
Me: That’s perfect dad. I love you.
Dad: I love you too baby girl. Be careful driving.

A cherished photo of our family at the dinner celebration ringing in 2024.