Kelley Irwin

One day last week my dad was asking my mom about the sandwiches they need to make. Ham and cheese, some turkey and fresh buns. Should they make them in advance or put the selection out on a table and let everyone make their own?

I asked why we needed the sandwiches. Without hesitation, Dad said for the golf tournament tomorrow. He was planning a tournament for 48 people – you need multiples of 4 he said – and he had to create the tee times and plan for carts. As he talked, it was clear to me he knew all the steps required to plan this tournament. He has done it many times in his 85 years and he wasn’t worried at all, just focused.

There is no tournament tomorrow. My dad has dementia. But that tournament is real in his mind, and important to him. So we helped with the plans and at the end he said, I think everyone will have a good time. And I replied – of course they will dad, you and mom are always good hosts. He smiled and gave me a hug. (Photo standing by the first tee in 2022)